


Early Morning Silhouette

by thisgirlinhere



Series: I Will Always Come Back (To You) [1]
Category: Raven Cycle - Maggie Stiefvater
Genre: Established Relationship, Fluff, Fluff and Angst, M/M, Minor Henry Cheng/Richard Gansey III/Blue Sargent, Ronan Lynch Loves Adam Parrish, adam x ronan - Freeform, but really light angst, college adam is good adam, how does one tag, pynch - Freeform, this is basically an introduction to the series i'm going to write
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-02-14
Updated: 2019-02-14
Packaged: 2019-10-28 13:57:27
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,845
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17788682
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/thisgirlinhere/pseuds/thisgirlinhere
Summary: "It starts as something small. A look, two hands brushing for a fraction of a second while they’re examining the same map before going out to explore. It seems casual to the others – and even to him, at first – but Adam knows better, knows him better. He knows just how much it means to Ronan, and after some time, how much it started to mean to himself. So it goes on, slowly turning into something more – visiting the Barns without the others, going on drives to nowhere in particular in the middle of the night, “sleepovers” and study sessions at st. Agnes that turned into Ronan running careful fingers over Adam’s callused hands, with both of them  always ending up sleeping tangled in the small mattress."---Or: The one with small and sweet pynch moments





	Early Morning Silhouette

**Author's Note:**

> Heyyyyyy it's me, back again with another pynch one shot!! I'm sorry for being gone for so long, i wasn't in a good place, but now i'm better and i'll be taking request at tumblr again (@cakiewrites)  
> Hope you guys like it, it's a small introduction to a series i'll do, detailing the scenes in this work.

It starts as something small. A look, two hands brushing for a fraction of a second while they’re examining the same map before going out to explore. It seems casual to the others – and even to him, at first – but Adam knows better, knows _him_ better. He knows just how much it means to Ronan, and after some time, how much it started to mean to himself _._ So it goes on, slowly turning into something more – visiting the Barns without the others, going on drives to nowhere in particular in the middle of the night, “sleepovers” and study sessions at st. Agnes that turned into Ronan running careful fingers over Adam’s callused hands, with both of them  always ending up sleeping tangled in the small mattress.

None of them talked about it, not when Glendower was so close to being found and definitely not when they both feared losing those delicate moments where every single problem seemed to disappear, so they moved on in a steady routine; going to school (something Adam did way more than Ronan), having lunch at Nino’s (something that Ronan never missed) and then, after school – and, most days, after Adam’s work – they went to Cabeswater with Gansey and Blue or to the Barns with whatever Ronan had dreamt up the night before or while Adam was at school. At night, Ronan would appear at his door, leather jacket, combat boots and smelling like trouble, they would talk and bicker and sleep in peace alongside each other. It was good, it felt good. Better than Adam’s previous one that didn’t include the Barns and Ronan sprawled in his mattress at 2 am.

-0-

Glendower was dead. He was dead and, for a short period of time, so was Gansey. They had all shed tears and when that night was finally over it felt like each of them had lost their last bit of innocence. They went home to Monmouth that day and crashed on the bed and at the couch and it felt as if they would never wake up again.

That night, Adam pressed impossibly close to Ronan and pressed his eyes closed, trying to calm his breathing now that he thought the other boy was asleep. He had almost lost him, almost lost him _and_ Gansey on the same night. Being there now, in Monmouth, with Ronan, felt like winning the lottery, like being the king of the world for one night, something that didn’t seem possible just a few hours ago. But, despite what others might think, he didn’t felt invencible. No, he felt close to destruction, to falling into death’s peaceful embrace. He was happy, but that felt like being too close to the edge.

A panic attack. That’s what it seemed. He wanted to move away before it got any worse, before he could wake Ronan, but as he started to disentangle himself from the other boy, he heard Ronan groan and move, facing him with a concerned frown and impossibly soft eyes. Adam felt the knot in his chest fade a little and he tried to smile, but he must have looked constipated because Ronan huffed and said:

\- You look like shit Parrish.

\- Thanks, you look like hell too.

And just like that, he felt as if things had just gotten a little more like they were. He kissed Ronan’s jaw and saw the boy’s eyes flutter closed, so he kept going, he trailed kisses in his cheek and the corner of his lips and the tip of his nose and he could _feel_ the blush that quickly crept in Ronan’s face. That made Adam feel powerful for the first time since the madness from earlier that day. They didn’t say anything, they didn’t really need to, never did.

Maybe words were too trivial to express what flowed like an ocean between them.

-0-

College.

Adam had dreamt about it since he discovered what it meant. Well, what it meant for _him_. Freedom, possibility. He had put all his effort into getting in and he cried for the first time in forever when the letter arrived, saying he had gotten in and that he had a great scholarship. It felt like a dream. Ronan held him close and cried with him, repeating over and over again; “I’m so proud.” and “You deserve this more than everyone else”. Ronan was _happy_ for him, actually happy, even though college meant not seeing each other every day, that it meant Skype calls and texting (something Ronan was trying really hard to do like a normal person) and only seeing each other briefly over weekends and holidays.

Ronan was happy because Adam was happy. Noticing that made Adam’s heart feel heavy, full of love, because he knew, in that moment, that Ronan _loved_ him. That he would do whatever it took to support him and his dreams.

He had never been happier.

And those next few weeks, the last four weeks of summer vacation, were spent with preparations and long walks around the fields, Adam stopped working and enjoyed every second he had left with Ronan and Opal. He moved to the Barns and got quickly used to waking up in the large bed, with warm sunlight peeking through the window and Ronan sleeping next to him like a heavenly figure, slack jaw and sharp lines framed by the sun and giving him agod-like appearance. Those days felt like the realization of a dream Adam never knew he had. He felt at home, he felt loved and he finally noticed that there was something, _someone_ , he wanted to come back to.

-0-

Going away for college felt like he was leaving a part of himself behind. He Skyped with Blue, Henry and Gansey early in the morning and they told him everything about South America and wished him good luck, making him promise to call at least once a week. Then, after breakfast with Ronan in the porch, they both visited Noah’s grave, where Adam told him about the summer and how he wished the ghost was still there to see everything, to participate. Adam and Ronan cried, the loss quietly setling in between them.

After midday, the BMW was already loaded with everything Adam possessed, Opal was roaming close, all covered in dirt and still confused about where exactly Adam was going. Ronan was still in the house, probably taking all the time he could with the dishes. Adam sighed and bit his lower lip, _he was not going to cry._ He pinched his arm once and sat at the porch, taking in everything he could from the Barns, wishing he could take a part of it with him, wishing he could take _Ronan_ with him.

When the other boy joined him, finally sitting by his side, Adam noticed his eyes were red and immediately felt his heart clench. _That’s why he took so long_. The realization made him scoot closer and embrace him, feeling the tense muscles instantaneously relax.

\- Hey – Adam whispered, fingers slowly tracing the intricate lines of Ronan’s tattoo.

\- Hn – The sound was small and so familiar to Adam, he felt his eyes water and held the other boy tighter.

\- I’m coming back you know.

\- You don’t need to. I know you always dreamed about getting out of this dumpster.

Adam breathed in deeply, he sounded hurt, he thought Adam was never coming back after college, or maybe that he was just waiting to break up after he went away. It sounded so ridiculous to him that he wanted to laugh, but he knew what was like to feel insecure, to feel disposable and unloved.

\- That’s true, going away has been my only goal since I was ten.

Ronan held his breath and it would have been unperceptible if Adam wasn’t so close. It looked as if he was waiting for the hit. Adam’s heart clenched again.

\- That was my dream because I didn’t have shit to come back to, I was alone, Ronan.

He forced the boy’s head up, but his eyes were still low, focused on the hand Adam had entwined with his.

\- That was before. Because now I have something to come back, _someone._ – he breathed in deeply, trying to prepare himself for what he was going to say – Ronan, I’m always coming back to you. You gave me a reason to come back the moment you kissed me in that room.

Ronan’s eyes shot up, eyes soft and red cheeks.

\- I’m in love with you since that day Ronan, I thought I had made this fact pretty clear.

\- I’m slow sometimes, Parrish.

\- No, you’re not. It was just easier for you to shield yourself and pretend this was obviously going to end.

\- Hn.

\- I’m coming back to you, asshole, so try to not to die before that.

Ronan smiled and Adam felt like he was going to explode when his lips touched a second after. He felt like the happiest guy in the entire universe and he knew everything would be okay. They walked to the car slowly, shoulders bumping and hands entwined. Those steps felt like a promise Adam was willing to keep.

-0-

It wasn’t perfect. Of course it wasn’t. They fought a lot in the first month and finding a rhythm that suited Adam’s college life and Ronan’s chores at the farm was hard. Some nights, he thought everything was close to an end and he felt cold and alone in his mattress. They learned to Skype religiously every night – except during final’s weeks – and sometimes they didn’t even say anything, Adam would just do his reading while Ronan read his own books or cooked dinner. It felt domestic in a weird way and helped Adam with the need to just jump back into the car and never go back to campus.

-0-

Ronan came to visit three times, the first one, was when Adam got sick and felt like he was dying in that dorm room. The second was during Thanksgiving break because Adam said he wouldn’t be able to come back because he was loaded with work. And the third was on Valentine’s Day, where he appear at Adam’s door with a flower bouquet, a huge pile of junk food and all the seven Harry Potter films.

They didn’t say much when they were together, well, not all the time, but Ronan never stopped to tell Adam just how much he loved him and how important he was for him. Sometimes, he didn’t even need words, just a specific touch, a different expression or a chaste kiss. It wasn’t perfect, but it was his, theirs. They were in the beginning of the life they were going to build for themselves and Adam had never felt more alive. He remembered what he had said almost an eternity ago; _“I want to feel awake when my eyes are open”_ , and realized that he did. He felt _there_ , that he _belonged_. He was finally in total control of everything in his life.

_It was beginning, it was all beginning._

**Author's Note:**

> Hope you liked if, if you did, please remember to give kudos and comment :)
> 
>  
> 
> p.s: sorry for any grammar mistakes, english is not my first language.
> 
> ~ Cakie.


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